Lauren Balik (@laurenbalik) unfollowed @joshfgray_ on Oct 9, 2024

What’s your best dbt tip?

If you're at Coalesce, your dbt is a mess, and you want $1000.. keep reading! The majority of teams implement dbt, and life is good. But as you scale, your model runtime gets longer, your warehouse costs skyrocket, and your team output slows down. Artemis monitors your models

Is Sequoia partner Shaun Maguire committing wire fraud and securities fraud with his manic election conspiracy theory posts? Right after Sequoia investment Kalshi got the green light last week, Shaun blitz promoted election denial conspiracy theories of fake texts posted on X

I could wrestle and pin Shaun Maguire in 15 seconds, maybe even 10 seconds

Wire fraud is a very serious crime. Shaun Maguire is a very unserious person. Making fraudulent claims from text messages and posting these on social media (wire fraud) in order to move lines and spreads around on a federally-regulated derivatives exchange you financially backed https://t.co/1D5OFqT5wq

I believe Sequoia Partner Shaun Maguire's @shaunmmaguire latest mental episode constitutes wire fraud, given his and Sequoia's promotion of federally-regulated exchange @Kalshi cc: @CFTC https://t.co/l60AmUE8px

to be fair, much of finance is 120 IQ people trying to grift 90-110 IQ people, but these prediction markets stand out as being especially silly and concentrated in time duration

Watching a bunch of 120 IQ people grift a bunch of 90-110 IQ people will never not be funny. The amount of piracy and intellectual dishonesty here is incredible. https://t.co/2pg7ffY1Fu

Serious philosophical question, not left or right coded, just philosophical: If Shaun Maguire @shaunmmaguire is screaming, screaming, SCREAMING about election results and then he promotes that he's invested in a platform where people can bet on the election results which he https://t.co/EosuuMHLPl

This guy gets better every day. Sequoia didn't learn their lesson after getting caught coming in behind Founders Fund trades in crypto and now in 2024 they're backing a Polymarket competitor. Incredible stuff. https://t.co/2qhF1DsNPb

Hmm...questionable. I'm typing this from Amity Hall down the block from Columbia, hanging out with my Jewish significant other who is a Columbia grad student who also went there for undergrad. She's there to learn. Columbia is mostly a made up media story on both sides.

We've been over the Techtronic (https://t.co/hXw5F63UA6) aftermarket lithium-ion demand Ponzi scheme run primarily through Home Depot $HD several times - the "Mary-Kay-for-Blue-Collar-Men" flipping scheme. We've been over the dead/underwater lime green inventory sitting in https://t.co/66axoMn3vL

Also, it's funny that Eight Sleep changed their methodology right after this. This is how you know I'm right.

This is the #1 thing people have ever pinged/emailed/msg'd me about. "How do you find this stuff, Lauren!? How did you learn this?" The answer is that I don't know - it's all public data and I know most don't bother with it unless it's tied up in a very neat bow. 🤷‍♀️ What can I

As value investors, we're really bad at identifying what could potentially work as a compounder. The market clearly likes $CURB as a growth concept This is a meaningful 20% outperformance since the spinoff and we all think it's fairly priced at $22 or so We own 1% to 1.5% in https://t.co/qK6LMwdPDC

If you are a young investor or a seasoned pro, it doesn't matter. But this especially applies if you are a young investor, listen to this at 1PM today. Alix is a treasurer and one of the most fascinating thinker. Clear your schedule and listen.

RT @Mr_Neutral_Man: @pekwat @laurenbalik No this is the kind of near Autistic artisanal alpha that I admire in an investor

Cava $CAVA is overexposed to Southeast hurricane disruptions vs. its peers which have stronger geo mixes.

All apple orchards are full of bees and none of these places have waivers, FYI, I've checked If you were deranged you could get stung by a bee and sue the orchard for negligence. Who is working one click SaaS waivers for apple orchards? Hardware and software play.

Where's Brad?!?!

Yep. David Sacks @DavidSacks backed CEO Ruthia He had been planning to fly the coop for months. My team of patriots has Sacks and co. under deep surveillance. More people need to understand that David Sacks is in the Mafia - the VC thing is a front. Rolfe Winkler at WSJ has

or Ghost. or whatever is easy to use and not going to have VCs or journalists like @EmilyStewartM of @BusinessInsider trying to cancel me

Do I Manifest Destiny all my bespoke alpha over to Substack or Beehiiv? I'll pick whichever one has the most compelling argument. Let me know thoughts. https://t.co/mfsjCE1dYF

we used to be a country etc etc https://t.co/mhz29olDg8

Very solid profit outlook on $APOG https://t.co/hUDqQR7b9r

I know of 3 funds that have unofficial "Lauren Books" and trade off what I post about on X. Not automatically, obviously, but close to it. Do I paywall everything here on out?

Let's bet on the outcome of an HBO doc where dozens (possibly hundreds) of people already know the outcome. https://t.co/8ID8Diei5M

I’m going to notebooklm every YouTube video in @knarfmartini2 ‘s playlist and upload all of the financials. I will not upload anything from UxC so the data is correct though https://t.co/9LJbn0FIYW

RT @ResidentialClub: Active housing inventory for sale, by September Sep. 2017 -> 1,308,607 Sep. 2018 -> 1,301,922 Sep. 2019 -> 1,224,868…

By this logic, Rumble $RUM would qualify, as J.D. Vance was involved (it looks like he still has shares) and David Sacks is on the Board and Rumble has acquired 2 of his companies (Callin and Locals). So it seems like J.D. Vance traded influence from David Sacks and then the

If people are ever scared of finance (many who are minorities, women, people who grew up without, etc.) don't be. This is what you're up against - goofballs who can't even finish their wings or beer playing self-storage tax gymnastics. This is your counterparty.

Classic finance piracy. The bookmarks will accumulate faster than the likes. https://t.co/T7EhbBlCwz

🚨Here's a 200 IQ X equity research tip I'll give away for free, with a small ask in return. 🤗 --- Aside from toilet paper, what else was bought out during this week's longshoremen "will-they-or-won't-they" drama? (I mean in reality, not just social media hyperbole.) I'll https://t.co/uxPudccCRr

Every Lauren Balik post is a home run. ⚾️ Every Business Insider @BusinessInsider article is a strikeout, even as their dilettante employees try to use X to cancel me before publishing materially false information about me. Strike three, Business Insider, yer outta here! https://t.co/enujcC91Mj

RT @litcapital: Fuck Business Insider All my homies hate Business Insider

lmao @MadsCapital https://t.co/VR0EWyqrDV

AI Winner. All that matters in the near term (next 3-5 years) is increment. The increment here has to be in personalization. Marginally more tailored ads, customized marginally better to the end user, ads become experiences and not just digital billboards. Billions in play.

It's been a great week on X watching finance guys (spread around pension fund/retirement money) act incredulous about labor (pays into pension fund/retirement money). What will happen when these large capital pools dissipate? Hmm? What will happen to asset prices if we don't

I really cannot overstate how poorly Advance Auto Parts $AAP stores are run vs. their peers. The EEOC is now suing for what was going on at some $AAP locations. This is what many investors don't fully appreciate. Even the more conservative types in rural areas and the South https://t.co/B9LWzQydOp

Love him to death or hate him to death, Marc is correct about Bridger $BAER. Nothing adds up here. Scrutiny of public and elected officials' business dealings (left or right) is important.

Who Will Save Duckhorn Portfolio's $NAPA Soul? We're days out from $NAPA's annual report, short interest to the float has piled up, and the trade here is really only whether or not the Duckhorn Portfolio will be acquired. They've acquired vineyards on their credit facility, https://t.co/E8Ir0qHLUq

i will make you a drink https://t.co/m8rl3NPWj2

i'm bartending at The Mayfly on Oct 17 to raise money for my marathon fundraiser for @BBBSNYC! get a ticket and come buy a drink!!!! (link below) https://t.co/XXd0z3U0bL

Ahhhhhhh Cliff Stoll wrote me an email and sent pictures of him holding a Klein bottle and his garden aaahhhhhh (this will appeal to cyber security folks of a certain age).

"As an AI language model, I can provide code snippets and explanations, but I can't directly modify or view your project files." But @v0 I'm asking you to write to @vercel project the chat is in. Do I really have to download all the files and re-upload them?

Dear Jamie Heller @JamieHeller, Editor-in-Chief of Business Insider, I would like to understand why your reporter Ana Altchek @altchekana made false claims about me that I did not respond to her requests to contact me. In reviewing my email, phone, and Signal records, I've

I actually like what the Morning Brew people do - it makes sense, it's entertaining. But the core BI stuff is awful, it's like a bunch of teenagers turning the HS newspaper into a gossip rag.

Business Insider is toilet paper. They wrote up an article about me and said I "did not immediately respond to a request for further comment" even though I never received comms. I will never forget this. Some spoiled brat lying about low yardage plays... https://t.co/hiuuTyVbvw

This guy. https://t.co/DCEYws6MOT

One of the biggest things in evaluating the Auto Parts space this past year was understanding the question: Who is running the storefronts? ❌Advance Auto Parts $AAP (which is getting crushed) tends to hire store managers with retail experience outside of the auto industry. vs. https://t.co/as4syYMsjT

Advance Auto Parts $AAP and Paul Graham had very bad Septembers. Two legacies no longer valid and gasping for air in this modern business landscape. https://t.co/a3RmgRB2q0

I enjoy Macy's GenZ business content - she's got an interesting style of presenting and covers a lot of ground digging into niche business stories.

It should be no big surprise that David Sacks has his own deputies running around San Francisco "mapping" things related to organized crime and human trafficking. If you want a good one: this Sacks crowd has been trying to mass distribute dashcams for mining crypto to https://t.co/0uIzAa10ug

Cava @cava $CAVA not one single NYC location of Cava was found compliant with any part of New York's Fair Workweek Law, and you paid out over ~$1000 on average to New York Cava employees, plus civil penalties. Skimming from your workers to inflate your stock price is pathetic. https://t.co/AIr7PB43lt

Tired: Haitian immigrants are eating dogs in Springfield, Ohio. Wired: Girls named Madison and Brittany are eating frogs at $CAVA. https://t.co/aaZCcCc3KD

Cava $CAVA is a disgusting mess of food safety and sanitation issues. We're in peak food poisoning season right now as well. October is when shiga-toxin e. coli cases historically peak with leafy green yields shifting at the end of Salinas/Central California growing season back

Man $COIN is so funny. 📉

Garry Tan. https://t.co/qjAoKOTK5O

A guy named Frying Pan could rout $COIN this week. Frying Pan decided to debut the science project he's doing at the Y Combinator Laundromat. Not only is it hysterical that Frying Pan just did a find+replace on someone else's code and used this to raise money, but Frying Pan https://t.co/GlVLv2CxHB

I'm not sure $LDI will be around 1-2 years from now, so that's where I'm focused.

Which round of MLB playoffs powered by Adobe $ADBE are people most excited about? -The T-Mobile $TMUS wild card round? -The Booking dot com $BKNG divisional round? -The loanDepot $LDI league championship series? -The CapitalOne $COF World Series? https://t.co/mvyr6HEwZn